need you

To the people who care, read. hurm, lets see,my friend got me writing this. i dont know about others but.. i think it all comes down to a person to be able to get through shit in their life. i keep telling myself to be strong. but when i think about it.. what IS strong?
Is it simply hiding your emotions and go on everyday, dragging? forcing yourself to be a zombie.. (a very busy zombie at that) trapped in a cage. -yes, i know.. it's only a cage if you make of it- , pretending like nothing's wrong and wait for it to be over? if thats what strong is, i dont wanna be strong. i want to go through life actually living it, enjoying it (no, enjoy doesn't just mean maksiat). i used love school for God's sake.

sometimes i'm just tired. not tired in the sense of exhaustion (sometimes tho). but tired in general. it gets harder everyday and i can't seem to focus my problems on studies cause my mind keeps wandering off.

hmm.. i kinda miss being myself.

but like what most people say, friends are very important. thank God i have friends here, not many i might add -my friend-making skill is terrible- classmates who share the same problem as i do (study-wise) and a God-sent friend,i need to find a new approach cause right now being strong isn't working.

anyway, parents are so important as well, being able to talk to them every once in a while helps, a lot. so, i just want to say to my friends who understands what i'm talking about, lets go through this together. God loves us so much.. i know all this has a reason and God won't put you through something you can't handle right? so i know we can do this. i just need your help k? i'm weaker than i appear to be.